Lines, lines, lines…

I’ve got something on my mind that’s been pissing me off lately. It’s about waiting in lines. I was standing at the grocery store the other night, waiting patiently to give them my money. The cashier two lanes over opens up and the dude behind me bolts over there like he’s running for his life. Then that checker steps out and says, “Sir, you can come down here.” So I walked on over there. This dude is all looking at me like he’s nervous, but at the same time, he wasn’t about to give me his place in line.

Now. My gripe is this: What in the hell makes him think he should be in front of me? I was in front of him in this line over here, and granted, he ran to the other one first. But my theory is that if a new checkstand opens, it should serve the people who have been waiting the longest. At the fronts of the lines. Not from the backs. I’ve been waiting ten minutes longer than this lunger, but he gets to be in front of me in the new line?

Well, to be honest, it really doesn’t bother me as much as I make out here. I know that’s just human nature. We’re talking about the average of society here. The people with two digit IQ’s. Which is fine. I’m no better than them. (Just smarter…) But what really pissed me off was the way he ran over there like a little baby. He took off so fast he left smoke on the floor. I mean, this guy hauled ass like he was gonna be fed to the sharks if he didn’t make it first. Just the way he ran over there made me want to kick his shins in and beat him over the head with his basket.

I had like nine items, but the express lines weren’t so express. They stretched back into the aisles. I would be better off waiting behind one woman with a basket full than twenty-five people with two items apiece. Because I know these fools are all paying with credit cards. Nobody carries cash anymore. That or these old women who write a check for a tube of tooth paste, and wait until the cashier reads the total before they even get their check book out. Okay, I need to quit thinking about it, I’m about to get pissed again and slam my flat panel monitor against this here plate glass window.

I just love people, you know?

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