A friend of mine relayed a story the other day that I was quite fond of, as it sounds a lot like something that would happen to me. She was sitting in the right-turn lane at a stop light and saw that the person in front of her started pulling out. So Rebecca (SheBang) looks back to check the traffic, and steps on the gas. SLAM.

The person in the car ahead had started pulling out. But then stopped. So Rebecca gets out of the car and starts walking up to assess the damage and talk to the other driver. As she gets halfway to the driver’s window, the old coot takes off. She had no clue she’d just been rear-ended.

So now Rebecca is standing in the middle of the turn lane and cars start honking at her, because they hadn’t seen the accident. Being terribly frustrated, stressed out, and a little shaken by the bump, she expels her justice by flipping the bird to the car right behind hers. Turns out to be a minister in her church.

The only part of the story I seem to have a little bit of problem with is the fact that it was the minister. At her church. Her church. She goes to church, you say? Yeah, apparently she does. Which is a little funny being the Minister of Sexual Relations here at the Brew. In her words, she has to account for all the evil she’s done all week, so she sits in a pew on Sunday. Good for her, I say. I always say I don’t go to church because I’m perfect and I’m better than you. (I mean I am, but that’s not why I go…) I go because I need to go.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not judging her, or saying she does a lot more wrong than I do. But I’ve just never met anyone – especially a female – who has sex on the mind more than I do. And probably on the bed as well! I kid, I kid. But no, really, she is constantly talking about, thinking about and going on about sex. Shrug. Okay, sounds good to me.

Way to go, Bang. I, of course, applaud your reaction. But if you’re going to be a badass, you gotta be one all the time.