Paris Hilton Eat Your Heart Out

While in Houston, Shift and I were waiting on our friend Khris (I think that’s how she spells it) as she tried on suits in Macy’s. We were in Macy’s too, you see. We were waiting on a woman. And there’s a Sunglass Hut right there inside the Macy’s. So, being bored, we decided we’d shop shades a little bit.

Space HiltonMy eyes almost immediately went to the ridiculously large Paris Hilton shades on the top shelf of the case. They were men’s shades, but just huge. Like something that would have made Eric Estrada proud back in his Chips days. Seriously, they were that big. Well, you know me, I had to try them on. So the lady got them out and I put them on, and magic was made, y’all.

I’ve never considered myself a big shades kind of guy – I mean, I think it takes a certain kind of person to pull them off. But I thought they looked pretty rad on me. Like I had a little style and class. Weird, huh? But the lady behind the counter told me she loved them on me. I know, she’s trying to sell them to me. But she said there were plenty of others she’d like to try to sell me, but that trying them on wasn’t even necessary. Whatever. Anyway, the point is, I like them, so I got them. So tell me what you think of them, dear readers.

I look just like Paris Hilton now. Now I just need a big purse and a little doggy. So here’s a couple of shots from the Houston trip. The first one is Khris and me in Shift’s Tahoe, heading to the bar to watch the game. The second is Shift and me at the Houston game, deliberately separated so we could get the hot chick in the frame from behind us. She had pretty good arthritis.

     

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10 Responses

  1. Moonshine says:

    And tiny flawless boobs?

    Yeah, dude. The shades are hot! I’m just glad that wearing the Paris Hilton shades doesn’t inspire you to speak like Paris Hilton…much.

  2. Kinetic Kim says:

    That’s hot!

    Those are a lot hotter than how you described them! And I think you can wear those any time, not just as dress shades.

    I guess I need to get bigger ones now. I can’t let a man have bigger glasses than me!

  3. Space says:

    Thanks, girls.

    Shine – I don’t even know how one would go about speaking like her. Does she speak at all?

    Kimbre – Yeah, I’ve grown terribly fond of them too. I even wear them with shorts and knee-high socks. But there’s no way mine are bigger than yours.

    Send me a picture of yours. We need photographic evidence.

  4. Moonshine says:

    Yeah, I’m pretty sure she speaks on occasion. My guess would be that she speaks a lot. But I didn’t claim that she ever says anything. And when you told me about them without punctuation or breath…yeah. That was the way I imagine Paris Hilton speaking.

    Actually, now that we’re all comparing size and the whatnot, I’m worried yours might be bigger than mine, too. Shit. I think mine are as big as I can handle. So if, indeed, yours are bigger, I’m just going to have to learn to live with it.

  5. Kinetic Kim says:

    Send you a picture? How about the one on the front page of this website? dork.

  6. Boo says:

    NICE!!…Oh, yeah, the shades look swell. Was that the question?

  7. Katy80 says:

    they look even bigger in real life! but their cool

  8. scott says:

    If you look just like Paris Fucking Hilton now, then I have to guess that you’re supporting her Big Fucking Feet, too?

    Paris Hilton is definitely the epitome of going over board, in more aspects than one!

    She got some serious Sasquatch feet! I wonder if they’re hairy, also.

  9. Space says:

    No, Threat, but I do have an exceptionally large penis. Does that count for anything?

    Last time I measured it, I was somewhere up around the four-and-a-half inch mark. Seriously doodz.

  10. Becky Riles says:

    haha! You’re too funny space.

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