Ending the Week Right

Weeks to me are like grass. I insult (or cut down) my grass once a week. But it keeps springing right back up. So too are my weeks. I keep ending them and nailing down the lid with drinking massive amounts of alcohol, but new ones just keep popping back up and sending me back to work. And this was a short week, since I took off Monday. And last Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and Friday. Well, in fact, that long vacation made this short week feel like an eternity. How am I supposed to be expected to want to be at work?

Anyway, I thought I’d write a quick note about the kick ass phone call I got as soon as I arrived in Florida last week. A publisher called me and said they were publishing a short story of mine, and said furthermore that they were very, very, very, very interested in my second novel. Yes, he did say the word ‘very’ four distinct times. Which excited me quite a bit. So you are looking at the next published author! Well, maybe not the next one. Someone might get published in the next couple of days. But definitely one of the next ones. Pretty cool, huh? I know, it took long enough.

Now I think I’ll stop writing novels and switch to shorter subjects. Like limericks, poems and bumper sticker quips. Here’s one I’ve been thinking of for a bumper sticker. Tell me what you think:

Hell yes!

I have a few more in mind too. But the politics one is my favorite because I have never understood what people think they’re going to achieve by putting a sticker on their bumper that says, “Obama in 08!” Uh, yeah. Okay, so now I know you’re an idiot because I know who you’re voting for. But what, did you think your sticker would sway my opinion on the matter? Or do you just like advertising your political views for the purpose of – of… Of… Um, I can’t even think of something to joke about let alone a serious reason. Seriously. Why do people do that? I just don’t get it.

Anyway, I think I’ve said enough about bumper stickers now. I’ll write something worthy of reading for you Monday. Oh, yeah, I know what I’ll write about. The Great Encounter of the Hambeast. Look forward to it!

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8 Responses

  1. Here’s a bumper sticker idea I’ve been toying around with for several years…

    “Relax, I’m not drunk. There’s a hooker giving me head and then I’m going to kill her and shove her into a trashbag and dump her into the river.”

    It would take a big bumper sticker, but I think it’s funny enough to where it would still work.

  2. I’ll bet you were at least four times as excited as if the publisher had just said very. Anyone as confused as I am about why they drop the “u” when spelling forty. I mean shouldn’t it be fourty?

  3. amanda says:

    Those work weeks…what a bitch.

    Yay for you!!! Second novel huh? So that obviously means there was a first. Did it not get published? Like I said, you have a way with words so I’m sure it/they are great. I’d love to read something you’ve done. I work customer service for a small publishing company so I know how hard it is to get your stuff noticed. Can’t wait to hear how it all pans out!

  4. Amanda Fellate? Is that you? I haven’t seen you since highschool!

  5. amanda says:

    Nope. Sorry. I don’t even know who any of you are. Just found a blog that I enjoy reading. Space just always has a way of making anything amusing or interesting and it helps me to smile during a crappy week.

  6. Space says:

    Oh I see what you did there Tommy.

    :downsrim:

    Thanks for the words Amanda. I’m glad it brightens your days.

    clicky

  7. Becky Riles says:

    I WANT that bumper sticker! Where can I order one!?? :haw:

  8. steppy says:

    Congrats! That is great. You should be very proud of yourself.

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