So let me tell you about our camping trip last weekend. It was hotter than a fresh pile of jalapeno-stuffed dog shit. We had fans in our tent, too. I also had a window unit air conditioner. I had it sitting on a TV tray, which was nice. Except that somewhere in the middle of the night, the cat ran into the TV tray, and the whole thing toppled over, crushing her. Rest in peace, Peachez. Damn, I’ll miss that cat.
There’s – well, there’s really not much to talk about. I mean, we camped out. That was about it. We didn’t really sit around drinking beer or anything. I mean, it was just a camping trip. Anyway, I told you I would tell you about it, so there you have it. Now you want to hear something real exciting? Read on, dear friends. Read on.
I’ll tell you what’s exciting. Shortly after Katy told me how awesome her iPod touch was, I rolled up to the Apple Sto in my six-fo. I bought me the 8GB because I’m not as rich as she, if you will recall. Well I’ve loved that thing like a pet puppy. I finally jailbroke it about two weeks ago. Don’t ask me why I waited so long to do it. But since I did, I’ve been using that son of a bitch like a woman uses a vibrator. I can play games on it now, rate my favorite restaurants, read ebooks, store my passwords, chat, look at porn and of course, listen to music when all is said and done.
Well after owning it for about a month I was like, wait, what? Why did I buy the 8GB model? I have over 20 gigs of music at home. I sure would like to have more of that on my iPod. I don’t have to have like all of them but more than 7.5 gigs would be nice. Oh yeah, I wasn’t rich enough. But I could have saved up for longer. Like save up for several more months, and I would have had the extra $200. Anyway, I digress. My point is that I have fallen in love with this little amazing device. I even have a compass on it. And ooh ooh ooh, check it out – remember that marble game you used to play called Labyrinth? There’s a wooden box with two controls on it and you roll the marble around avoiding the holes? This game is on here and you just tilt the iPod, using its accelerometer to move the marble around. Freaking amazing. Maze – ha. See what I did there?
So yeah, it’s a bad ass piece of equipment now. Not just an mp3 player with a built-in calculator. So I was thinking the other day, as I sat looking at my Razor and my iPod, you know what? why the hell do I carry a phone at all? I could slam these two devices together and carry one of them around. So I did it, doodz. I went out and bought an iPhone. And here’s the big deal: the 16GB model is $300 bucks, just like my 8GB iPod. Same price, twice the functionality, twice the hard drive space. Well, flash space. Whatev.
So yeah, as soon as my iPhone comes in, I’ll have all the functionality of my phone, my iPod, plus the camera and all that. And get this: this not only has wi-fi like my iPod, but it has AT&T tower support. So everywhere I go, I’ll have internet access. So yeah, I can quit starting my paragraphs with “so yeah” now.
So yeah, I’m terribly excited about this, and find myself getting very aroused every time I think about it. I will be sure to let you know how it’s going once I receive it. If it takes any longer than another couple of days though, I may just choke myself to death. When I buy something, I like to get the shit NOW. I don’t like waiting seven to ten days. Especially for something as cool as technology.