Movie trailers are beginning to really irritate me. They have gotten so good at making movies look really really good. Then you go see them based on the weight of the trailer, and the movie blows horse snot. I’ll give you some examples. Number one is Vanilla Sky. I had so many people telling me it was a great movie, and that it had a good twist at the end. Okay, so I watched the trailer. Excellent! I can’t wait to see it.
It sucked. Well, that’s not really fair either. Most of it was good, but
Secondly, we went to see Mothman Prophecies the other night. My dad won free screening tickets, so he gave them to me. So I prepared myself by watching the previews. Whooo!!! I can’t wait! I was excited all day about going and getting the shit scared out of me! Surely this would be a terrifying movie. It blew goat semen. I guess it was because it was based on true events. It just never seemed to climax. Sex without the orgasm. That part in the preview where the phone is ringing, so he rips it out of the wall, and it keeps ringing… Oooh… Shit that gave me chills in the preview. In the movie it is so anticlimactic. It’s like cake without the frosting that falls apart in your hand and disappears, leaving only donkey mucous. What a waste! Will Patton kicked ass in it. Hell, so did Richard Gere. But the movie just kind of sunk and died. Never seemed to go anywhere meaningful.
I guess I’m going to go back to my old ways. I used to watch movies, then come home and see the previews afterwards. I did that with the Others, the Matrix, and many others. So I had NO IDEA what those movies were about when I went to see them. Therefore I was not let down by overly high expectations. Previews take the movie out of context. They have someone answering a question that someone doesn’t really ask in the movie. Or dude says, “Where’s my car?” and woman says, “We’re in it.” But in the movie, her answer is to a completely different question, so in the movie she really says, “I think someone stole it.” It’s a bunch of propagandist whale blubber.
You want to see a good movie? Go see Spy Game. That kicked the walrus’s ass.